The Very Picture Of You

Don't you just love how the titles of my blog posts are pretty much always so irrelevant ? Haha.Well anyway.A lot of things have been on my mind lately.This past few days I've spent doing absolutely nothing at all.Nothing productive at least.I always tell myself I will change and work hard tomorrow.But tomorrow never comes.Thats what you call procrastination I suppose.I'm so bad at this.Expressing my feelings through words.I don't even know why I bother sometimes.God,this is so messed up.

I guess,I just want to change for the better and work hard towards my dreams.But I'm not really sure why it seems so hard.Its not really.Just take the initiative and do it.I guess I'm in a sort of dreamy kind of mood.I feel so out of this world.Its like my body is here but my mind,heart and soul is somewhere else.In this imaginary place where everything is just as how I want it to be.But in reality,we all know that can't happen unless you make it happen.

Which is why,I really need to change.To start making every single day count,to live life to its absolute fullest.Because nobody really knows how much time we have left to live our lives right ? I mean,one second we could be here on Earth and the next we could end up with this deadly accident and just die.So make it count.Thats what I was always trying to do.Make the few months I have left in high school count.To make more memories,to meet more amazing people,to go through more experiences and just to do more than just exist.To leave my mark on people,to be remembered.Not just to be someone who spent a few years in this world without ever really showing anything.Without ever really doing anything to be remembered.

And I know what I need to do to get there.I know what I want better than anyone else.I know where I want to be in life.I know what I want to achieve and what I have to do to achieve it.So I'm not gonna waste any more time because time is precious.I have one final shot at my dreams and it isn't going to waste no matter what.I'm gonna make it count and I have faith that I will.I'm just trying to put my doubts aside and letting my faith be bigger than my fears.Its never too late to change.

*gonna post about MSSD next :)

So MSSD Track and Field 2013 huh?Quite an experience I would say.Nothing much accomplished here.It was all down to bad luck.Bad luck that there was 20 people in a single 800M heat.Bad luck that I fell somehow.Not sure whether it was because I tripped or someone pushed me.But honestly it doesn't really matter now right ? I mean nothing's gonna change.I still lost.Yeah.Never thought a single fall could alter how I would perform for the rest of the events.Just that one fall.It did its damage alright.Really bad wounds on both my knees.I finished the race but lost the qualifications for the finals by just one second.Frustrating isn't it ? I mean if you think about all the possibilities if I didn't fall and if I just pushed myself a little harder.The thing I'm most mad about was how that fall affected my other events.Stupid wounds didn't allow me to bend my knees properly and I couldn't warm up or stretch properly for the remaining few events.Yeah I tried to just ignore the pain and forcefully bend my knee but it ended up bleeding again.Not a good idea I know.Still,at least I managed to finish running my other events.Boy did my knees attract a lot of attention haha.I was just like,this are my battle scars :p Nahh no I didn't do that.But it was a really really fun MSSD this time I would say.Have really gotten close to my athlete family this past few years and they were all so nice to me after I fell.Thank you so much guys,it means the world to me. Getting home really late,being the last school to leave the stadium,thinking of plans to ponteng school the next day,Harlem Shake in the bus,cheering for each other,camwhoring.It was amazing alright.So much memories made :)

Love this people with all my heart :)
We did badly this year,but we'll try harder next year.We'll show them.

Oh yeah,I found out that there is this one phrase that could pretty much make every athlete shed tears after he/she lost.
"You're still a winner in our hearts."

Thank you Ben and Dianah and everyone. :')
I'll win next year.Promise.

Cupids Fall

Lost,miserable,tired,exhausted,giving up.

Yeah that pretty much explains how I am now.I feel so stressed out with my studies.I mean I honestly don't get anything.What teacher is teaching,I don't get any of it.Especially physics and biology. Not one bit. I'm so upset and I'm so scared.March test is a week away and although I probably won't be here for it,I'm still scared.

I just need this month long break.To figure out everything I fail to understand.To catch up.But time waits for no one right.And with every week,I'm feeling more and more lost.I just need everything to stop.I need everything to slow down.Its all going past way too quickly.

Oh,why won't I be here for the March test you ask ? Well thats because my track and field district championships is clashing with the test.Its on the exact same days.I wouldn't say I'm upset about it though,because running is the only thing keeping me sane now.Keeping me from madness.I'm so thankful for it.Without it,I wouldn't know what to do with my life.

About MSSS merentas desa a few weeks ago.Lets just say I didn't perform well.Got no.25. Out of 78 others. And you know,at first,to me,it was considered alright.Not too good neither too bad.I mean it is my first time you know.But apparently my dad and coaches don't think its good enough.They have high expectations,I get it.They want me to succeed,I get it.But at least have some encouraging words ? All I wish they would say is,how its okay and how i already tried my best.Not make me feel worst.

But it doesn't really matter.I need to improve.A lot.In order for me to get there.To my ultimate dream.I know.It just seems so hard.Its scary,being so close,but so far away from my dream.

Happy Birthday

to this guy,Agilan Manivasagan ! :)
Hi Agilan,I shall try my best not to call you a dog or a monkey or whatever since it is your birthday.Your birthday is on valentine's day i mean like seriously its still so cool.Anyway Agilan,you are so retarded I honestly have no words.But then again so am I and so are Jo,Dharsh,Jay,Thanesh and the rest of our gang.We've pretty much bonded a lot this couple of years.You are my olahraga mate,my fellow prefect and my best friend :) Thank you for being there all the time and being the retarded person that you are.Thank you for all the good food at your deepavali open house. YUM. You are basically one of my bestest friends and I know you miss us as much as we miss you no wait you miss us more than we miss you right ? :P haha. So have fun rich boyy ! Its your birthday you're so old now ! Kidding :p Happy Valentine's Day and Happy Birthday Agilan !

NIKE JACKET SO AWESOME. :D

Halfway There

I'm halfway there.And soon,I'm gonna be there.Where my wildest dreams come true.Where all the hard work,all the tears,all the sweat,all the blood will finally pay off.

6th of February,2013.
I'll remember this date forever.This was the day where I finally qualified for MSSS.I'm a district runner now.I am a legitimate district runner ! Can you imagine that ? But I'm not gonna stop here.I will fight on,until I make it,to MSSM.My ultimate dream.

I am finding it hard to believe myself.Just what happened on that day.It was all so surreal.The night before,I was showered with good luck wishes from my friends <3 It meant a lot to me so thank you all.I told myself,I absolutely cannot fail this time.I have to make it to MSSS.If I can't make it to MSSS this year,how am I ever gonna make it to MSSM ? The whistle was blown,and I ran.I ran and ran and ran and ran till I was so exhausted.Thank God for En.Subra who was there to support me all the way.Thank God for making me find Rubhern and having someone to jog with me to the finish line.Thank God for giving me courage,strength and determination.I made it.I ran past the finish line and I got number seven.My best achievement,ever.How I felt was indescribable.I was in so much pain and I was so tired.But it was all worth it :)

Seeing the smiles on En.Subra and all my olahraga mates faces.Hearing my mum's elated voice on the phone.Getting congratulatory messages from the people I love.It was all worth it.I am happy and I am proud for my target for this year have been achieved.I can't wait for MSSS although I know my chances are very slim,I vow to give it my absolute all.This is a once in a lifetime opportunity and I am so grateful for this.Thank you God,for everything.It was all so amazing :)

Cheers for an amazing week :)

The memory of being here with you,is one i'm gonna take my life through

Happy New Year you guys ! :) This is especially for you guys !
Warning : If you hate gayness & cheesy crap then please exit this page before you get an asthma attack lul whut. 

For Dharsh :)
Hi babygirl , ;) Remember you said when it comes to you and me its never gay ? So don't you give me this :

I will slap you. :P Anywayyy,Happy New Year babyy ! Its a new dawn,its a new day,its a new lifeee ! For us & I'm feeling good ! No actually I don't really feel so good TEEHEE. Its been 3 years darll,you & I both know that for us to still be best friends up till now,its a special friendship that most people don't have.I've always been so grateful to God,for letting me meet you that one day in 1 Usaha.I honestly thought I was gonna sit with Jo for the entire year,but obviously God had better plans for me.I had to sit with a stranger and the whole time I was beside you I was hoping you'd take the initiative and errr..make the move (lul) because I'm socially awkward.Okay la maybe only around people I don't really know. But I guess it took some teachers who weren't proficient in English (was that right lul Idk) to get us to start talking to each other.Oh no wait,I mean to start SMILING at each other and also my correction tape who decided to end its short-lived life to get us to start talking hehe. Weird huh ? But then we started getting closer because you had no one to recess with since Prasena and Iris were prefects and you came with us boohoo :P and after that,I guess I don't even need to say much,we bonded so much with each other throughout this 3 years ! Its crazy ! I guess its because I'm a little retarded inside ,you are a little retarded inside,we all are and there is no one else who are as retarded as us so we just had to bond. Shit I love my retarded theory. Ermahgawd what am I crapping really.Just to summarise all that,you mean the world to me so please don't ever ever change.I hope we'd still continue bonding with each other for the next few years and hopefully make the term "best friends forever" come true. Remember,forever is only just the beginning ;) haha,I love you Dharshyy ! :p May this year help us make more amazing memories together <3




For the retarded woman who has an incurable obsession with kids,Joanne Theresa ;)

H-h-h-h-Haiiiii :)

Sorry for posting that up hahaha :p Its better than the sleepover one okay ;) hahahaa. Anyway babyyy
I honestly don't know what to say la hahah.Happy New Year ! :) I hope this year,will help us make more precious memories together and for us to bond even closer. <3 Firstly,you are beautiful.Yes baby I meant that stop denying it.You are.We all know that.A person with a great big heart like yours,you are just the sweetest and kindest person on Earth and we all love you so much for you being just the way you are.Yes at times,you can be annoying with your Rafa and your love for One Direction omg seriously ?! -.- Maybe its just because I love The Wanted la but ergh. At times,you can also be the person with the least attention span.Please tell your stories without any delays you know how much we hate that.But then again,those times are nothing compared to the other times where you're the kindest person on Earth,where you help us do everything we ask you to do without saying a word,where you tolerate me when I bully you like hell,when you play along with us when we act like we don't want to be with you,when we act like we love each other but don't love you oops ;) but you still love us all the time,each and every day.I know I've said this almost a million times,but baby,stop being so nice.Just stop.Its killing me :').We've known each other for the longest time since standard one back in primary school and although we weren't close,we did talk :) You were so quiet back then omg it was like heaven on Earth. HAHAHA I kidding :p Thank you for these past 9 years,I really cherish each and every moment we spend together and I know you do too ;) Have a great year baby and always remember that I love you. :) btw,look below. haha don't be jealous ;)


For MY PRETTY  JAYSHREE ;) (take that Joanne)
you're gonna kill me for this but asdfghlkghi this photo still gets me every time i look at it so voila!

HAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHHAHAH.
SO CUTE LA YOU CASSERIE. Is that how you spell it ? Idk la whatever.
Happy New Year !! :D I hope you have an amazing year,but you always do.You're super smart and hardworking it makes me speechless.Stop being a nerd,stop being so pretty I hate you,stop attracting all the pariah boys attention omg its so creepy, but don't stop making all of us love you :) Jay Jay Ily even more now that you have the same name as one of The Wanted's guys, Jay Mc Guiness hehe. Sorry I know that was a little out of the blue. You darling,have been a big help to me :) Everytime I'm sad and down,you're always there for me.You cheer me up and so does the rest and thats one of the reasons I freaking love all of you.Continue striving for the best,because you deserve it and we all know that. :) All the effort you put into your studies :) just wow. Thank you so much for helping me with my PMR because I'm gonna say this,and I really really truly mean it,i don't think I would've been able to get straight As if it wasn't for your last minute tutoring. You should do that for SPM also la,be my tutor for life. ;) So I definitely owe it to you,and also of course Joanne,Prasena and Iris and more for giving me last minute revision classes.HAHA I'm sorry but I think I forgot all about the kek crap already :p You're one in a million Jay,and please stay the way you are,don't ever change,continue being the one and only Jayshree that we love :) I love you ! <3

Gold Forever

So yesterday,I went over to Joanne's place for her Christmas Party ! :) Was so excited and psyched for it as I'll be able to see everyone there again after so so long ! Really missed them oh my goodness. So I went there,and the first person I see is Dharsh ! My baby omg ! Aimi,Nameetha,Cyn Er and of course Joanne were also there. Gave them massive massive hugs cause I missed them like hell.So we went to have our lunch first,the boys were late !

Then they came ! Thanesh,Agilan,Jun Fai,Appala,Nicholas and KH. It felt so good seeing them it was like being in school all over again :) hahaha. Then we had a good chat,laughed a lot,went up to Jo's room,made a mess of her bed. Threw this ball she had at each other,drank Sparkling Juice,gossiped,played a brief truth or dare and just had a great time. :) I haven't laughed like that for so long. They just make me feel happy,and I am so blessed to have them as my best and closest friends. <3 It was a day well spent,we went home at 6.

I can't wait for school to reopen,because I've missed it.Is that weird ? haha. Its a whole new year next year,and I really can't wait to start running and everything. :)

Thank you guys,for all the joy you've brought into my life these past 3 years. :)

Somewhere Over The Rainbow

I can't even begin to explain how elated I am about this.PMR results were out a couple of days ago when I was still in Sydney.So I was anxious the whole time there,trying to get someone to inform me of my results since I was unable to collect it myself.Sydney is about 3 hours ahead from Malaysian time so that made the wait much more agonizing.

But the results were out & surprisingly Thanesh was the first person who told me 'bout my results.Honestly my hopes of either Joanne or Cyn Er being the first to tell me just went down the drain...But anyway,he said I got straight As ! So obviously coming from him,I tend to be a little suspicious on the truthfulness of it all so I asked him whether he was serious or not but he did not reply. So I had to wait for like 4 hours or more until I could confirm my results which was when I finally talked to Joanne.

I got straight As ! :D Our whole bloody gang got freaking straight As OMG ASDFGDGHGHJLKI GAHHH ! :D I am so happy and just grateful that we all managed to get straight As and we'll all be in the same class next year ! Again ! :) For the past 3 years,I've gone through the happiest times of my life and a big part of that is because I had them by my side. I love them so so much <3 The bond I have with them is something I've never had before,ever ! :) Too bad I missed out on all the celebrations back in Malaysia.Oh well.Will find time to post about Sydney another day ! I need to return to the land over the rainbows <3